People seem to think that because you do one thing well, it means you can do everything well. And, I DO love to try to accomplish new things. But I'm really bad at failing. Some people out there get back up and keep trying. Me? Well, I give up. I like the comfort of knowing that whatever it is I choose to do, I do it well. Hubby made me see that last night. As I lay there with tears in my eyes feeling completely overwhelmed by a task I was asked to complete. He said I had to challenge myself and see that I CAN do it. The problem is ME. I keep comparing myself to all the amazing artists that exist out there. I even torture myself by having their work open and in my face as I fail to capture their artistry in mine. SO frustrating. Why do I do this to myself?
I have 11 more days to complete my project and I feel like I am suffocating as each minute passes. I have 9 cards to make and ship out AND I have to prepare to teach a class, after I come up with whatever it is I will be teaching how to make. I went from saying no to everything to saying yes to everything and now I am completely overwhelmed and I kinda feel like throwing a 2-year-old tantrum.
I was sitting and thinking back at a time that I did challenge myself and surprised myself. It's actually one of my greatest memories so far. We were in Puerto Rico celebrating our 10-year anniversary and we took a catamaran ride from the main island to one of the smaller islands. First off, I got on a boat! A pretty small boat, if I do say so myself. See, I don't swim and I am TERRIFIED of deep water. The boat ride was about 45 minutes until it stopped so everyone could snorkel. HA! Snorkel? Well, I can't do that. BUT, I did try. I put on the floaty and the flippers and the mask and attempted to put my face in the water. Unfortunately the fear swelled up in me and I decided to get back on the boat. But everyone was surprised that I had tried, most especially me.
On a paper-related note, I shipped the 100 camera cards out! WOOT WOOT! What a relief to have completed that task. I did a little decoupaging to the box I got to store the cards in. I decided I'd do the logo that was printed inside the cards. I hope she loved it!
Thanks for sitting through my tortured-soul post and I really hope you have a wonderful weekend!